Let's Pretend

It has been one heck of a struggle learning to be intune enough to realize when I am not being congruent with myself. By that what I mean is what I am feeling and the way I am behaving are somehow at odds with one another. There’s a disturbance going on somewhere inside me, but I’m telling myself it’s OK and then behaving as if it’s OK or as if nothing is out of line. And what I've realized is that the larger the stake I think I have in the outcome, the greater the denial. The more emotional the issue, the easier it is to play “Let’s Pretend.” This game then utilizes the big bag of the coping mechanisms we all have to cover up what we don't really want to face. This game gets old quick. So from now on instead of turning to the big bag, I'll chose to view these incongruencies as warning signs. Signs that I need to take a look at what is going on and that something needs to be dealt with instead of swept underneath the rug. Because although we might fool others it really isn't possible to fool oneself.